New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
