Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
