I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
