oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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