Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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