We got so high we made milksteak
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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