Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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