Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.

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(815): View more from Illinois

I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.

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(313): View more from Michigan

sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test

(1-313): View more from Michigan

but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.

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(925): View more from California

I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position

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(434): View more from Virginia

So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.

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(705): View more from Ontario

We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.

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(519): View more from Ontario

Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!

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