idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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