hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
