he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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