Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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