clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Dick very happy bro
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
