What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
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