the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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