Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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