lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
