Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize