It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
