Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize