The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
