im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
