is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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