You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Randomize
