I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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