The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
