just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
