i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
