made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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