dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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