but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
