We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize