Your tits are I can't wait for
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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