So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
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