I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
