its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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