She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
