she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
