Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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