i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
