so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
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