Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
