Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
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