i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
