Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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