Just mADE A PArabola og urine
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
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