So gin and wine won't be happening again
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
