found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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