My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
