oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
